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June 3, 2011 / Astor ICS

Emotional Reactions and the Time Dimension

I used to worry about my strong reactions to things. Not everything that came my way, but the one’s that were shocking or made me feel anxious before their resolution. Like knowing that an agreement or a decision was going to come and it was not in my
own control. Waiting, worrying and then when it did happen or was completed, a sense (most usually) of some kind of relief.

After lots of these I thought that if I could just skip the worry and anxiety. So I did. I trained myself to realize that in a period of time it would be resolved. I could count on that as a sure thing. Not that it would always be resolved in my favor but it would be, and it was a guarantee, ended and I would move on from there, many times to forget that it ever existed.

So if I don’t even regard those times as important individual life experiences, why did they bother me so much?

I didn’t need to get into the why, but get at the ‘how’. How to eliminate that space of time between realizing something could be a problem (maybe a very big problem) and it’s final outcome. Restless and sleepless nights, stomach queasiness, a non-stop hyper speed train of dizzying thoughts were a few of the bothersome side effects that I became extremely tired of.

So I told myself to remember each time that it happens, the feeling I had when it was over, and try to remember it very very well. Then, I emphasized to myself that this feeling always comes. I said to myself that if it feels like a release and it always comes then all the anxiety was my own personal reaction due to lots of life experiences and those reactions were not actually truth and true, they were temporary and my own creation. I realized that I have a certain amount of control over myself and that I could develop different aspects as I please. So I worked on it.

The next time a problematic situation presented itself, I acknowledged that it was one of those sequences that I go through and told myself to calm down, realize that I would feel better when it’s resolved and that it was temporary, with sometimes more on the way. The real problem comes when more than one or two of these happen in the same time frame.

So with all this in mind I found a way, not all at once, but gradually to make the radical mood shifts calm down and it gave me added insights into how to resolve the situation because I was calmer and clearer.

Try it for yourself, but realize that it takes a few tries before it has its best effect.

It is really having a view, a sense and the will to confront your own emotions and their lack of effectiveness in the long term by using the time dimension to your benefit; realizing that in time it will resolve and that it takes a clear mind, body and spirit to get the best results while your constant state needs to be less extreme so you live with the purpose that life is not just a series of little experiences, but it’s also one long experience that can truly have an equilibrium and a balance of emotions and feelings that serve your best wants and desires.


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